Card From Cindy

I wanted to share this moving card and letter Gene received from our daughter Cindy.

August 10 Update

Gene had his 10th treatment a week ago, and it has really tired him out. But we know that with each chemo treatment, he will become more tired. We had planned on attending the AQHA Youth World Show this week, but feel Gene needs to regain his strength so that we can attend the AQHA Select World Show in Amarillo.

We were so honored that during the American Quarter Horse Youth World Show when each state or country had their Team Parade ... Nebraska honored Gene as being one of the state's famous people!

They listed Johnny Carson and some others – which I did not even hear because I was so proud that they had Gene's name.

We are so very proud of our Nebraska Youth and how well they have exhibited at this World Show. The show ends tomorrow. You can see video here: http://www.aqha.com/youthworld

On another note: I am always looking for good meatloaf recipes, as meatloaf seems to be Gene's favorite food right now. Please email me or leave a comment if you have a good one!

Again, thank you for your continued prayers and thoughts for both Gene and myself.

Till next time,
Barbara

July 27 Update

Dear friends and encouragement givers,

So very sorry I have been AWOL for days! I have just been feeling sorry for myself, and that horrible ache in the pit of my stomach just does not seem to go away.

Last Friday was Gene’s ninth chemo treatment, but first he had a scan, then labs, then a doctor’s appointment with Dr. Ramaekers. Cindy was able to come also.

Gene did get a good report – the doctor is so pleased with his continued tolerance of the treatments and how well Gene is handling them. His cancer tumors in the lungs have shrunk again. The doctor feels for Gene’s age (74) that he is doing very well.

Even though Gene’s reports were good, he has had a bad week due to the shot he is given to increase his white blood count. The shot makes him really miserable – his bones and body aches, but I think tomorrow he will start to feel better.

I have such mixed emotions … . I want to do so much to help Gene, but I don’t want to do too much to make him feel helpless. So I walk a fine line. (As most women know, when men don’t feel well, they can get crabby!!!)

I think what I miss most after Gene’s diagnosis is our time together, remember we have been married 49 years and have spent most of that time working and playing together. I miss Gene going out with me each early morning to help me do farm chores. Of course now we don’t have horses at home, but still have our two big hunting dogs that have to be fed, watered and each walked. This way I get in my 2-mile walk with the dogs.

I especially enjoyed our evenings together after work: our cocktail together and great conversations. I am positive we will get back to our normal life, but right now it is taking one day at a time.

I so appreciate all your kindness and prayers. We are still getting some lovely notes, and Gene always loves getting phone calls (308 380 0508).

Until next time,
Barbara

June 21 Update

Happy Hot Summer!

It was so nice to get a little more rain on Wednesday, but we realize how dry it is for most of Nebraska and the surrounding area. (Sorry, I don’t know how to do a Rain Dance!)

Father’s Day was very special with Cindy, Jim, Samuel and Taylor spending the afternoon with us. We had a “comfort meal” of mashed potatoes, gravy, corn and hamburger steaks. Homemade pies made by our own Grand Island pie maker and friend Virjeanne Baker were a special treat.

Gene had his seventh treatment on Monday, June 11. Tuesday he got the shot that he so dreads, but he knows it helps the white blood cells build back up. This shot affects Gene similar to flu symptoms – but he is very brave about all the treatments he gets.

We feel very fortunate that Gene receives such excellent care, and I am so thankful that we can get Gene’s treatments right here in Grand Island.

The St. Francis Cancer Center is such a wonderful facility. Everyone knows your name, and the nurses and doctors are very caring and concerned about your every need.

It is also amazing to see how many cancer patients come to St. Francis. The most disturbing of all is to see how many people are affected by cancer. All the patients greet one another, and there seems to be a community among all of us.

Tonight, Diane Sawyer on ABC News will be talking about a cancer breakthrough, and it may involve a young person finding some new discovery. Let’s hope and pray that something can be done about this dreaded disease.

Thank you all for your kind thoughts and prayers – they are working!

Next time, I will tell you about a great book I am reading that everyone needs to read. It is about being the best YOU can be.

Till then,
Barbara

Caregiver Tips:

We all know the benefits of drinking water, but Gene and I both see a marked improvement when Gene concentrates on drinking lots of water. I am sure it flushes away some of the toxins that are in his system.

I mentioned before that I like to put fresh lemons in our water, but now I am putting cucumber slices in our water glasses. This is very refreshing, and what a simple way to make your taste buds more active.

June 11 Update

What a fun-filled weekend we had!

Gene and I drove to Omaha on Friday and had a wonderful dinner with our longtime friend Barbara List. Then on Saturday morning, we were in the run/walk for pancreatic cancer held in Omaha.

Daughter Cindy and granddaughter Taylor ran in the 4-mile run. Gene and I were so proud of them. Taylor passed her mother, but Cindy was a real hero: She ran the 4 miles in very good time, even though it was a tough run. There were many hills, which Cindy doesn’t have to face in Broken Bow!

While in Omaha, I did sign a petition to be sent to Congress to increase the financial support for pancreatic cancer research. Pancreatic cancer only gets a very small percentage for research from the government, and this is such a difficult cancer to detect. We desperately need a screening test.

I want to say a big “thank you!” to our wonderful family and friends for the continued prayers and thoughts for Gene during his cancer treatments!

It is because of all your prayers that Gene’s cancer tumors have shrunk in size … by 90%. Dr. Ramaekers is so pleased with Gene’s progress, and we are, too. But, of course, we have to be ready for a plateau.

We had another call from our good friends Butch and Charlene Morgan from Colorado, checking on Gene. J.D. Yates calls at least once a week.

We are so thankful for our “Horse Family” – everyone has been so concerned and helpful to both of us. And we can never forget our Grand Island support team of family and friends. (If Virjeanne Baker keeps bringing us homemade pies, we will be too fat to move.)

Today, Gene is having his seventh treatment. We arrived at the St. Francis Cancer Center at 8 a.m., and he will probably be here for at least six hours today. I never look forward to the days after Gene’s treatments, but I know we have to take the good with the bad.

We are both trying to be very positive, but I have many bad moments where I silently pray that Gene does not have to suffer like we all have seen so many of our loved ones do. They say God only gives you what you can handle, but sometimes I think I have already handled more than my share.

On a more practical note, here’s a new comfort tip: It is helpful to bring your slippers or flip-flops along when you are getting your treatments. I always need to remember to bring a shoe horn. Sometimes it is difficult to get shoes on after several hours of sitting.

I would love to hear your comments and any advice or tips on making this journey through the dark tunnel of the unknown.

Thanks so much.

Till next time,
Barbara

May 24 Update

Dear Friends, 

It is unbelievable how supportive you have been to Gene and me during this very stressful time for both of us – and of course Cindy, Jim, Samuel and Taylor! 

We had such a great surprise yesterday. Taylor (our granddaughter who will soon be turning 18) and Samuel (our grandson who will be 14 at the end of the month) drove down from Broken Bow to spend the day with us. We are so very fortunate that we have such wonderful grandchildren. We are so very proud of them – they are very nice kids plus good students and athletes. Of course their parents, Cindy and Jim, had a big hand in their upbringing. (I have attached this wonderful picture of Gene with Taylor and Samuel.) 

It has been an up and down week. Gene was scheduled for his sixth treatment on Friday but his white blood count was too low. So on Monday, he had a shot of Neupogen and they continued these shots through yesterday for a total of three shots. 

We are hoping that on Friday, Gene will be able to take his sixth treatment … which of course will take all day and then he leaves with a chemo bag, which he wears for 48 hours. 

Gene has been worrying about his schedule for his American Quarter Horse duties as he is now president! We had all the treatments scheduled and our travel plans scheduled around them, but we will make it work. 

Each week, I learn more about being a caregiver. There are so many great FREE publications available at the Cancer Center. The one I picked up today is great – “Caring 4 Cancer.” 

There are many tips for the newly diagnosed cancer patient, such as: 

Bring paper and pencil with you to doctors’ visits for taking notes, or ask a friend to come with you and take notes. 

MY SUGGESTION: If possible, take one or more of your children with you. It was so helpful when we went for our first visit and took our daughter, Cindy. Cindy had many more questions than I would have thought. 

Our doctor has been wonderful, and at each visit he puts Cindy on speakerphone – so she feels she is very much a part of what the doctor is telling us on how the treatments are progressing. 

Another tip: Sign up for a customized weekly e-newsletter that will provide you with timely, helpful tips and support as your treatment plan progresses: www.Caring4Cancer.com I will check this out and let you know and if it is worthwhile. 

Remember, as I said earlier this week: “Love is often hidden till it’s given away. Love is a gift we can give every day!” 

Barbara         

May 14 Update

It seems like a merry-go-round!!! One day feeling great (maybe good) about how Gene is doing, and the next day … not so good.

Thankfully, he has had more good days but does get very tired, so I always have to remember to walk slow (I am noted as being the fast walker of the family).

We just returned from Jacksonville, Fla., where we attended the AQHA Region 10 show. WOW, it was very successful: They had almost 250 trail participants, plus many in the English classes, western classes, youth classes and reining classes, and I hope on Sunday they had equally full entries in the cattle classes.

It was wonderful seeing so many people that share Gene’s and my love of the American Quarter Horse. We saw many old friends and also met new friends.

It was so rewarding to hear all the good comments that AQHA is doing for membership, and we are fortunate to have such dedicated volunteers that worked this show.

I always like to give a few ideas or hints I have learned along the way during Gene’s cancer treatments. (By the way, at our last doctor’s appointment, Gene’s cancer cells had shrunk 60%. That is good news but as we know not a cure. As the doctor said, these nasty cancer cells are always looking for a way to get around the treatments!)

So, on to those tips: 

• The very best sugar-free syrup we have found is “Walden Farms.” It is calorie-free plus sugar-free. I even warm it up before putting on the pancakes. (This is a good find for those looking for comfort foods while watching sugar intake.) 
• Be sure if you are a caregiver to have a good thermometer on hand. I like the easy one that you apply to the ear. 
• I have been having Gene use a face spray tanning lotion every morning. I think it gives him that "little bit of color." (He asks me every day, “Do I look pale?”) 
• Gene is going through extreme feelings of hot and cold, so he does not drink ice in his water or have really hot food. It gives him a tingling feeling, almost like a shock. 
• I have been buying lots of lemons to put in his water. It is so important for any cancer patient to drink plenty of water to flush out the toxins in his or her system. 
• Hand sanitizer is also very important as we all know, but I am trying to make it a habit to use it, especially when traveling. 

Finally, I did forget to mention: SHHHHHH! Let’s not mention this blog to Gene. I am not sure he would be too thrilled to know that I am telling ALL!

Keep Praying and Believing in Miracles,
Barbara